I must have used this sentence several times on many of my blogs, but i have to say it again...I'm really in awe. I go to dance everyday and even through all the petty frusterations and questions that i put myself through, i sit back and wonder.........what a miracle this is that I am here today doing something that my heart aches with gratitude when i even think about it. It is for the first time that I am being allowed to give an open voice to the emotions, the feelings, the expressions that have remain suppressed and inside for so long. Even now there is so much we hold back, so much we have pushed so deep inside for fear of getting hurt, or letting others seeing our vulnerabilities. But this mode of expression is purely divine for me.....it allows me to dwell so deep into that world that I had tucked away, out of even my own view, to drench myself in it and give it expression in freedom.

My teacher is a form of my guru for me........she is pure feminine energy with so much fire, so much passion. I have met people in my life i considered creative, but after meeting her I am out of words as to what creativity means, and where it comes from. She brings out the creative element in you from places you have shut down, she brings to life a bamboo pole or a piece of cloth, she lets your emotions come alive and take voice, she makes you feel each thing around you until you get in touch with that conciousness that is beyond anything physical.....it is so deep in love.

Today as she handed us a circular thin branch like structure, she asked us to explore various aspects of it. Whether feeling like an infant in an embroyo, slowly awakening to the world, or experiencing it as a trap or bondage of our own making, or playing with it as ones beloved......we explored fear, anguish, pain, suffering, love and the inner world of a woman. It was a beautiful process as I felt all these feelings inside me and could express them through movement and emotion. It left me feeling lighter, more liberated and brought a smile on my face as I felt freed from something I'm probably not even fully concious about. I am just left with a beautiful feeling inside me, of unexpressable gratitude to the universe, to my guru, who has allowed me to feel again. Thank you.