A new look ...

Finally got a new look to the blog of mine. I think I like it more than the previous look....tried to choose a simple template this time, also gave it a subtle background colour so that the content keeps the person's attention rather than the colours. I've changed some of the fonts to make them more visible, and changed the blog heading so that it now has a description. I'd been going through some other people's blogs too, and realized how a small yet impactful description really catches the eye of the reader, and gives the blog a whole new feel. I like its look for now....but will keep playing around with it for sometime.
I remember when I was younger and would go get a funky haircut or highlights in my hair....my mom would say......you only do such things to your hair when you're feeling unsettled inside! That would make me so mad at the time........ofcourse I'd find ways to completely retaliate to that comment, and am not sure if I still agree with it. But I'm realizing as I spent the last hour or more completely revamping the look of my blog site, that somewhere this urge in me to change the look of my blog came from this inner realization that soon I will be turning to a new chapter in my life. And with this realization I am looking at cleaning up things around me, throwing away unnecessary garbage that I don't need to carry along.......similar to what people do before diwali, or new years, kind of almost unconciously reorganizing my life before I head on.

The last chapter of my life had begun when I had left my job at Redknee in Canada.......it had begun with the need to understand myself, to understand what made me tick, what I had wanted to do in my life. The chapter before that had been of university life......where probably the most essential things on my mind had been related to my social standings.......all the fun that I wanted to fill my life with, all the friends that I could hang around with, all the trips with my friends that I could squeeze in.......somewhere lost in a zone where I was always dependant on things esentially beyond my control for my happiness. This chapter after university, after being at a job that made life as routine and mundane as it could be.............this next chapter where I was discovering myself........seems to be moving onto a new chapter soon as I take up a job with the Isha Home School in Coimbatore.

I am not sure what this next chapter will bring with it.....feeling both nervous and very excited to read on. I have a feeling the next chapter will be more about commitments.....more about jumping in head on into whatever comes my way, taking up things and seeing them to completion, about doing whats necessary and leaving "myself" behind in a way I never thought possible before. I know alot about me is going to break....there are going to be times I'm gonna want to run away, want to just come back to my old comfortable style of living...........but it will be when I can hang in there day after day after day...........that something beautiful will emerge. And it is to experience that beauty, which emerges from it all.........that I will stick in there, that I will be stubborn as hell, that I will have to be stern with my mind....letting it know over and over and over that i am not its slave anymore....that I know what's better for me than it does ..............that's the only way.